I absolutely cherish human connection, touch, and physical affection. Growing up those things were discouraged or forbidden, based on the fear that it would lead away from God and into sin. I have always felt too affectionate to be allowed, but in my healing journey, I have learned to accept this part of myself more … Continue reading The Vitality of Affection
Blog
Loving Little Kylar
My younger self asked to be loved a little deeper this week, and it has been overwhelming. I didn't realize how much I was still rejecting aspects of me. Little Kylar got in trouble for crying, being scared, for needing comfort. So I choose to agree with that treatment and despise myself every time I … Continue reading Loving Little Kylar
Building a Relationship with My Body
After the first 22 years of stress related extreme fatigue and inability to build muscle, I have had an 18 year consistent but varied personal health journey. I have been underweight, overweight, injured, weak, strong, learned new skills, experimented with my nutrition, etc. If there is one thing I have learned, it is that every … Continue reading Building a Relationship with My Body
Earning versus Receiving
This won't resonate with everyone, but this has actually been a MAJOR theme of learning for me the last few years. Struggling with extreme fatigue and weakness growing up, everything was naturally harder for me. Being told I was actually lazy and not fatigued also meant I worked harder to prove I wasn't lazy and … Continue reading Earning versus Receiving
Learning to be “Selfish” With My Energy
I grew up with extreme fatigue and inability to build muscle. This was from the stress I experienced in my home. As I dove into my healing in my twenties and became more aware of how I experienced my surroundings, one of the things I learned I had to be committed to was guarding my … Continue reading Learning to be “Selfish” With My Energy
The Vulnerability of Sexuality
What is your experience around sex/sexuality? It is such a taboo topic. A charged topic. Governments and religions have attempted to control it in civilized nations for thousands of years. People can feel shame for either lots or little experience. People can be shamed for either lots or little interest. If you believe the Bible … Continue reading The Vulnerability of Sexuality
Don’t Shrink
Something I’ve noticed that Christians often misunderstand about God’s heart as portrayed in the bible is the concept of oneness verses separateness from God, where if one is great, the other can’t be. I believe Christian’s overemphasize our separateness from God/Source/Creator. I realize this is usually in an attempt to not “steal glory from God” … Continue reading Don’t Shrink
Overcoming Addiction
This quote right here explains so much about what I have been experiencing the last 2 years and why I feel like my life (and I) have been changing to the point of being unrecognizable to my previous self. I am slowing down, I am learning to relax, I am practicing trust that I am … Continue reading Overcoming Addiction
What Would It Be Like To Have A Dad?
WHAT WOULD IT BE LIKE TO HAVE A DAD that could be proud of me? What would it be like to have a dad that saw me as an equal/potential equal, and was okay with or even eager for that? What would it be like to have a dad who was proud of me? Or … Continue reading What Would It Be Like To Have A Dad?
If I Never Marry
Someone asked me how I would encourage one who was on a journey of being single when their heart was to be married. After many years of deep bitterness, where every happy couple, every romantic movie with a happy ending, left a bitter taste in my mouth, I am softening to the a place of … Continue reading If I Never Marry
