What makes a sheltered homeschooled boy choose to go to massage school? More than you might think. My dad started asking me to massage his feet when I was three. I was very eager to please, and I gave the best foot rubs I could. (I found out years later that he asked the same … Continue reading Why Massage?
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Unmade, and Remade
This is a version of the death I must die to live the life I long to live. In the past, yes, things were brutal, and I did so good making the best of it. I was unseen, unheard, unwanted in many aspects of my reality. But if I carry-on approaching life from those feeling … Continue reading Unmade, and Remade
Empathy, C-PTSD, and Health
I spent the first 22-23 years of my life becoming a highly skilled empath as I developed Complex-PTSD in an abusive home. As a result I was dealing with multiple stress related health issues, including hypothyroid and hypo-adrenia, resulting in extreme fatigue and inability to build muscle. I wanted to get healthier and stronger, but … Continue reading Empathy, C-PTSD, and Health
Empaths and Fitness
Do you know how being an empath effects health and fitness? Being empathic means you are highly in-tune with the emotional experience others are having around you, sometimes so much so that you aren't even "in" your own experience. This ability is often developed through traumatic experiences, and may accompany the development of Complex PTSD. … Continue reading Empaths and Fitness
The Vitality of Affection
I absolutely cherish human connection, touch, and physical affection. Growing up those things were discouraged or forbidden, based on the fear that it would lead away from God and into sin. I have always felt too affectionate to be allowed, but in my healing journey, I have learned to accept this part of myself more … Continue reading The Vitality of Affection
Loving Little Kylar
My younger self asked to be loved a little deeper this week, and it has been overwhelming. I didn't realize how much I was still rejecting aspects of me. Little Kylar got in trouble for crying, being scared, for needing comfort. So I choose to agree with that treatment and despise myself every time I … Continue reading Loving Little Kylar
Building a Relationship with My Body
After the first 22 years of stress related extreme fatigue and inability to build muscle, I have had an 18 year consistent but varied personal health journey. I have been underweight, overweight, injured, weak, strong, learned new skills, experimented with my nutrition, etc. If there is one thing I have learned, it is that every … Continue reading Building a Relationship with My Body
Earning versus Receiving
This won't resonate with everyone, but this has actually been a MAJOR theme of learning for me the last few years. Struggling with extreme fatigue and weakness growing up, everything was naturally harder for me. Being told I was actually lazy and not fatigued also meant I worked harder to prove I wasn't lazy and … Continue reading Earning versus Receiving
Learning to be “Selfish” With My Energy
I grew up with extreme fatigue and inability to build muscle. This was from the stress I experienced in my home. As I dove into my healing in my twenties and became more aware of how I experienced my surroundings, one of the things I learned I had to be committed to was guarding my … Continue reading Learning to be “Selfish” With My Energy
The Vulnerability of Sexuality
What is your experience around sex/sexuality? It is such a taboo topic. A charged topic. Governments and religions have attempted to control it in civilized nations for thousands of years. People can feel shame for either lots or little experience. People can be shamed for either lots or little interest. If you believe the Bible … Continue reading The Vulnerability of Sexuality
Rise, and Rise Again 